Let me just start this post by saying, "I've got 99 problems, but sorbet ain't one."
That's a Clint Gulett quote from our evening at the Mabry House. And it's true. While I feel like I have 99 problems, sorbet is not one of them and never will be.
Problem No. 1: I just popped three liquigels and chased it with a grape Jolly Rancher. It's just that kind of day. If that doesn't work, I plan to emotionally medicate with the three bags of candy/chocolate I bought on my lunch break. If that doesn't work, I'm stopping at the liquor store on the way home for a magnum of Cab Sav and a block of cheese.
Problem No. 2: Man, I love a cantaloupe. That's why yesterday, after looking up the calorie count on my favorite fruit and realizing there was only 188 calories in a medium-sized cantaloupe, I proceeded to eat the entire thing. I was unaware of the water weight this would add to my physique. Around 9:30 last night, I looked about 26 weeks pregnant with my cantaloupe baby. I tried to get Ty to take a "pregnancy highlight" photo but he thought I would regret that decision. It would have been darn funny.
Today, my cantaloupe baby is gone. But it has given me a brilliant idea to pass on to the school system. Forget the flour sack baby, all you home ec teachers. Start making kids eat entire cantaloupes and experience that displeasure.
I feel better after getting that out.